My girlfriend always
laughs during sex ~ no matter what she's reading.
Quote by - Steve
Jobs (Founder, Apple Computers)
I saw a woman wearing a sweatshirt with Guess on it, so I said
Quote by - Arnold
Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for
black men. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black
Quote by - Tiger
My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch.
Quote by - Jack
Clinton lied. A man might forget where he parks or where he
lives, but he never forgets oral sex, no matter how bad it is.
Quote by - Barbara
Bush (Former US First Lady, and you didn't think Barbara had a
sense of humour)!
Ah, yes, Divorce, from the Latin word meaning to rip out a
man's genitals through his wallet.
Quote by - Robin
Women complain about premenstrual syndrome, but I think of it
as the only time of the month that I can be myself.
Quote by - Roseanne
There's a new medical crisis. Doctors are reporting that many
men are having allergic reactions to latex condoms. They say
they cause severe swelling. So what's the problem? Quote by -
There's very little advice in men's magazines, because men
think, 'I know what I'm doing. Just show me somebody naked.'
Quote by - Jerry
Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find a woman I
don't like and just give her a house.
Quote by - Rod
Lots of women just go out with me to further their careers -
Quote by - Emo
I'm dating a homeless woman. It was easier talking her into
Quote by - Garry
Whenever I date a guy, I think, is this the man I want my
children to spend their weekends with?
Quote by - Rita
My computer dating bureau came up with a perfect gentleman.
Still, I've got another three goes.
Quote by - Sally
(Computer dating) It's terrific if you're a computer.
Quote by - Rita Mae
Computerized dating can save a lot of guesswork - but so can a
Quote by - Ed
The whole dating ritual was different when I was a kid. Girls
got pinned, not nailed.
Quote by - Bill
I was dating this girl for two years and right away the
nagging starts: I wanna know your name.
Quote by - Mikey
Sleep with a guy once and before you know it, he wants to take
you to dinner!
Quote by - Mires
Yeah, I'm kind of lazy. I'm dating a pregnant woman.
Quote by - Ronny
I have no luck with women. I once went on a date and asked the
woman if she'd brought any protection. She pulled a
switchblade on me.
Quote by - Scott
Rumors about me? Calista Flockhart, Pam Anderson, and Matt
Damon. That's who I'm dating.
Quote by - Ben
Do you believe in computer dating?
Only if the computers really love each other.
Quote by - Marx,
My grandmother's 90. She's dating. He's about 93. It's going
great. They never argue. They can't hear each other.
Quote by -
My mom always complains about my lack of a boyfriend. Well,
next time she asks, I'm going to tell her I'm dating two
different guys : Mr. Duracell and Mr. Energizer.
Quote by - Michelle